Monday, 8 July 2013


 Last Christmas we took advantage of the offers being made by the DIY superstores and bought a kitchen.

At that time we were still making the building airtight in a harsh winter; fixing insulation to internal walls and battening ceilings and walls onto which plasterboard would be fixed.

I don't find buying kitchens - or any kind of shopping - easy. Having bought the kitchen, we then had to buy the appliances. And traps are set into which I fall with regularity. Jill had been Googling ovens and hobs until late and then came to bed. I'd got the iPad open and was busy. She leaned across and looked into the screen, expecting to see dishwashers or extractor hoods. She found the food of Turtle Doves. In my defence, it could have been much worse....

Such a long while ago .... and the kitchen order seemed abstract and unconnected with anything real.

The order has waited and waited but last week a big lorry arrived and off came countless boxes. We had ordered carcass units ready built, but every other detail, every drawer, door and runner had to be assembled.

And, y'know the pressure was on. Steve, in his usual cheery way, warned darkly about fixing the units to the walls ourselves. And Dan, our joiner, is a perfectionist and I dreaded his reaction if the fixed units were not spot on. To say I was worried did not do justice to my state of self-confidence. Jill contemplated removing my laces and belt at one point...

But, Roger the Unflappable had no such self doubts and after I had levelled the units, he fixed them.

Then Roger went off, leaving me to face Dan and his unforgiving long spirit level.

In he came and placed his spirit level upon the fixed units.

'That'll do for me...' and he got on with the rest of the job.

One short phrase. One massive upwelling of relief...

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